This month the Goddesses worked through the chapter on Aphrodite, our inner beautiful muse. Tanishka led us through our experience with our own Aphrodite energy and then we gathered in circle to discuss it with each other

According to the stories carried down from history, Aphrodite was born from domestic conflict. Her Fathers castrated genitals were thrown out to sea, which produced a white foam that she arose from as a fully grown beautiful woman. The townsfolk married her off to Hephaestus (a humble blacksmith with a crippling disability), who was unable to satisfy Aphrodite’s appetites, so she had passionate affairs with other men

Eventually leaving Hephaestus, she had 2 children with Ares (the God of war). And later had a 3rd child with Hermes (the God of wisdom). The 3rd child was a hermaphrodite (with both male and female sexual organs), which is said to be symbolic of her healed and whole emotional state

Aphrodite is the Goddess of love, desire and pleasure. She is our inner beautiful muse who is driven by a strong need to heal any childhood wounds, though coupling with her opposite

We dont need to look far to see her presence within our world

  Fortunately we are learning how the Barbie dolls we buy for our little girls reinforces an unrealistic expectation of beauty and body image. We are also learning how the beauty and fashion industries have impacted negatively upon the self esteem and self worth of women

The main lesson of this energy is SELF LOVE ❤

Our inner beautiful muse teaches us how …

To appreciate our own unique beauty

To clarify romantic intentions and admit our flirtatiousness, to avoid hurt

How to free ourselves from destructive attachments with those unable to love us

To acknowledge we can only love another as much as we love ourselves

To not seek out prince charming who rescues us from our unhappiness

To own our inner victim and strengthen our ability to meet our own needs, instead of seeking out men to “rescue” us, which creates unwanted karma drama

To take steps to heal our deep emotional wounds

To practice compassion for self and others, regardless of imperfections

To tap into our senses to fully appreciate the experience of pleasure

She challenges us to experience transcendent love without needing the “other” to act as a catalyst, which avoids creating dependent relationships formed from unhealthy attachments

Aphrodite influences our SEXUAL and our CREATIVE energy

According to Tanishka this energy vibrates within our SACRAL CHAKRA, which is located in our pelvis. This is our inner child and pleasure center, where we experience our world through feelings and sensations

This energy is full of EMOTION because its our heart space of FEELING, which influences our creative abilities and our intimate relationships

Many of our challenges in this chakra is related to our social conditioning

Living in a Western culture, feelings are not valued as much as a rational mind. We have been taught to trust the logical process of thought more than our hearts

Our passion and emotional reactions are often frowned upon. We have been taught to not loose control and so we become more and more disconnected from our bodies and from our feelings. Instead of feeling our experiences fully as they happen, we learn destructive psychological self defense mechanisms

We avoid, deny, suppress, regress, act out, repress, dissociate, compartmentalize, displace, project, intellectualize, rationalize and compensate

Fortunately, as our inner wild woman AWAKENS (Lilith) she teaches us how to RECONNECT

Living in a Western culture we are surrounded by SEX because it SELLS !!!

Yet on the other hand we are also challenged with cultural shaming around sexual issues, which results in blocked or excessive energy in this area

As a highly sexual and creative woman I was VERY challenged by this chapter

I confront multiple lessons as my relationship with SELF changes

I continue to experience lots of conflicts and challenges within my intimate relationships, as I consciously focus on my own healing, change, personal development and spiritual growth

  The first time I attempted to work through this chapter, I resisted because I was still in the midst of a heavy heart hurt. I had ended a relationship with a man the previous year and during the healing process was unexpectedly reconnected with an old love (for a 3rd time). A man who came back into my life with the same complications, who ultimately broke my heart open again

During this heartbreak I choose a lover who kept my heart open, who was the catalyst for some deeper healing, to whom I’m very grateful for

But oh yes, my love life was in a bit of a mess !!!

Something that obviously needed to be addressed sooner rather than later

Sometimes I do wonder 😊 hahahaha

With far too many messy thoughts to process and far too many heavy emotions to release, I tentatively retreated and hit ….. PAUSE

So, I will be completely honest with you, I wasn’t really looking forward to getting back into this chapter because I knew it was going to be challenging

Our right to FEEL and our intimacy NEEDS will surface around this energy

Our biggest challenge being our experience of GUILT

Universe blessed me with several opportunities to fully explore and experience this energy, which all became a tad overwhelming, especially towards the end as I juggled other life challenges, transitions and changes

In typical Aphrodite style this energy kept rising as more thoughts became conscious, more patterns became obvious, more emotions were released and more energy was shifted, until it reached a very impressive climaxual conclusion

My perfect storm

The biggest learning for me was ….

Full ACCEPTANCE of emotion, is related to our ability to fully experience the HURT of heartbreak and ALLOW it to break us completely OPEN to love

Full RELEASE of the hurt, is related to our ability to fully overcome our FEAR of being abandoned by another

SELF LOVE then is our ability to release any hurts and overcome any fears that prevent us from FULLY loving ourselves

Sometimes we can love others so much that ultimately we abandon ourselves

Over the years Ive often loved and cared for others more than myself, especially within my role as mother, wife, lover and nurse. Often prioritizing the needs of others above my own. Even now, at times I still struggle with this internal conflict whenever I choose ME first. Each time I chose myself experiences of guilt and shame surface because I feel less than the person they want and/or need me to be

But each time I prioritize the needs of others over my own, I unconsciously say to myself that someone else matters more than I do

Choices that hurt and cause wounds on a personal, cultural and collective level

Granted while our children are young their needs often do come before our own and the needs of our partner are to be considered

BUT …

As our children grow and mature shouldn’t they learn how to become more responsible for their own needs ?

And wouldn’t our relationships flourish more if our partners didn’t rely and depend upon us to meet their needs ?

The process of healing involves acknowledging our wounds, releasing the emotion held in our bodies and then we can begin to experience that wonderful whirly, whizzing orange glow of energy as it flows more freely

Am I totally OPEN and HEALED from all my past choices in love ?

Am I LOVING myself enough ?

Am I completely OPEN to receive the kind of soulful love I seek ?

Only time will answer those question because when it comes to LOVE its all about our every day choices ❤

But I strongly believe that the more self loving we are, the more loving we become. Our service to others then comes from a more stable grounding, which will have many more positive and long term effects

Oh YES … I am enjoying learning more about how energy is blocked and released 😊