Breaking through the barriers

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Its been a balancing act as I juggle life now, while healing from the past and planning for the future

Some major changes occurring both within and around me

Yesterday I reached my emotional limit and snapped under the pressure

Messy thoughts ran rampant and unsupervised through my mind. Raw emotions were unleashed during a state of panic. I was that whizzing needle on the compass, frantically trying to find its direction because my emotional balance was off center

I wasn’t coping and had an emotional breakdown

A temporary state of WTF ? ? ?

Although I DO trust and embrace this process, while in the midst of it we are unbalanced. So its far from being a comfortable experience

I reminded myself … “its just another storm”

But how I steer my ship during those storms is changing

All those defense mechanisms and coping styles have been brought to light. So they no longer hold the same power and control over my experiences

Old habits may die hard … but they DO die

No longer afraid of feeling the hurt of a broken heart … I open it willingly

No longer afraid of my emotions … I release them freely

No longer afraid of my darkness … I welcome it lovingly

Sometimes I have a firm grip on the wheel and steer right on through the lashing rain, gusty wind and unforgiving ocean. Other times I drop anchor and brave it out. Yesterday I fired a flare and my sisters paddled on out in their row boats

We talked about those changes within and around me and I began to feel a little more confident about the conflict, the challenge and the change

At home I had a few heart to heart conversations with myself and the rains began to ease, the wind dropped, the clouds parted and the ocean calmed

So … I slept

This morning I woke with a deeper understanding about the storm

I had a BREAKTHROUGH !!!

Another mask dropped, another wall removed, another layer of myself discovered

“Breakthroughs happen when limiting thoughts and behaviours are challenged” (Fabienne Fredrickson)

So, after an intense exploration of my inner Aphrodite, sacral chakra energy, I’m now ready to wrap up the experience and move onto the solar plexus

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