To dance with love, we must also ride the waves of loss

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It’s with a heavy heart I write this …

I’m having my cuppa at my sister’s home this morning, listening to the rain while everyone is sleeping (I’m feeling the urge to go stand in the rain to cleanse). Keza brought me here last night because it was a tough day. I recieved the message I’d been waiting for, but dreading.

“The life support was being turned off”

So, I was given the opportunity to see my friend, which I’m eternally grateful for, because I needed to touch her warm body one last time. She passed away peacefully yesterday avo. Although we talked openly about death and both have faith. Although I believe her spirit has been drifting between worlds since last week. Although I sensed her presence when the “locked” shower door flew open last Wednesday. Although I’ve noticed the black crow/raven frequently crossing my path. Although she visits me in my dreams. Although   her love and support continue as a spirit guide.

My heart breaks 💔

She was more than a friend, she’s my soul sister. I feel the heaviness of my loss, but my heart understands the hurt in her family’s heart. Although unafraid to die and accepting of the cards she had been dealt, like our Mam, she didn’t want to leave her beloved children. She has 4 gorgeous kids, all under 25 yrs old. And 2 beautiful Grandchildren, whom she adored.

It’s times like this, I struggle to wrap my head around the BIGGER purpose and meaning of life. Although death isn’t the end and our soul is on a journey, there’s so much loss to bare.

Not only have I lost our parents and a best mate, within the space of 3 years. We’ve also lost our Nana, a cousin and an Aunt. Then there are our Family friends who have lost their parents too. And several family and friends who are still on the battle field with cancer.

I drank afew whiskeys last night, which is never the answer, but meditation wasn’t easing my racing thoughts and overwhelming emotions.

My light’s a little dull at the moment and my heart feels heavy. So, I’m booked in for a reike and card reading session this morning. To help balance my energy and give a little clarity.

To those reading this with a heavy heart

I LOVE YOU ❤

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